I don’t know what it is about men and the locks or passwords on their phones, but I know I don’t like it. If you’re in a monogamous relationship, what is there to hide? What’s the deal with when I walk by, you turn your phone over so I can’t see your screen? Why is your ringer always off when we’re together? Then have the nerve to say that I’m paranoid. I was in a relationship where he never left his phone alone in my presence and even took it with him to piss. If there’s nothing to hide, then why all the secrecy? I believe two mature adults that are making plans to spend the rest of there lives together should not have secrets! If I can’t trust you, how am I supposed to build with you? Now am I wrong for wanting the man I’m with to be open and honest with me? To add injury to insult, he blocked me from all his social networks. The only one he didn’t block me from was Facebook (that’s because he barely used it). Now he bent over backwards to convince me that he wasn’t cheating or hiding anything, he just wanted privacy. Unless you working for the government there shouldn’t be that much privacy in the world! In discussions with my coworkers (mostly white), they couldn’t understand why anyone would have the need to lock their phone from their spouse or significant other. This leads me to believe it is a cultural thing. Many black men grow up believing that it’s okay to have extramarital affairs. Their “friends” and “family” back them up and also help foster this negative behavior. Now I know people have their own mind, but when you don’t have a positive role model, who do you follow? I truly believe that if you genuinely love someone, you would go out your way not to hurt them. As much as honesty can sometimes hurt, lies hurt worse. What are you men holding on to? Why are you so afraid to let us women into your lives completely. Why is is so easy for men from different racial backgrounds to openly do this and you black/latino men can’t or won’t? I’ll tell you why, because you are obviously doing something that you don’t want us to know about. But I know know from experience, “All things done in the dark shall come to light!!” And that’s real talk, so if you think your CIA agent shit gonna stay a secret forever, I feel sorry for you. You’re going to end up losing a good woman, if it hasn’t happened to you already. Besides don’t you know that we are detectives at heart. With the help of the internet and these new gadgets, we could make your lives hell. I know a few women good at cracking phone codes. How do you think I knew he was doing something? LMAO @ him!
Lol.. First off its not just men. I know lots of females that have passwords on their phones. With the turning the phone over?? Well you never know. Maybe he was texting a female, maybe he was trying to surprise you by ordering something. I’ve learned to never assume unless you have some kind of evidence. I don’t believe no one should be searching their mates phone. Some things and jokes in your phone can be taken out of context. Just imagine one of your friends or co workers that you’re very cool with and knew for ages, but you know he’s a flirt text you. And it says”damn that ass was looking nice in that dress”. Even if your man knows him, how would you explain that?
Blocking from social networks? Sometimes you got to do that too to keep the peace. I’ve done that numerous times. Growing up when i greet female friends it was a hug, or a kiss on the cheek, or a hey babe, hun, honey, boo etc in person, online or texting. And they would greet me the same way. Thats just how they are. My wifey hated it.. It would cause so much problem for no reason at all.. Her reasoning was you don’t know these females, they gonna want more, blah blah blah.. So to avoid the arguing and fighting we couldn’t be friends on the social networks. Out of sight out of mind.
In terms of extramarital affairs? Every race has them, white, black, Chinese… It’s ultimately up to the person to abstain from this behavior. Male or female we all have those friends that’s gonna urge you to do the wrong thing. But like you said all things done in the dark shall come to light.. So if that’s the case why keep searching for something negative? If you’re happy then just live and enjoy life together. Life’s too short.